I don’t very often ask for help, but I think it is about time I took stock of some opinions and indeed, if possible, some help in the form of advice from you all.
This concerns the topic of the big M – money! I have come to the conclusion that I have never really come to grips with the reality of what money actually is and what it means in my life (and possibly in yours as well). So I gave up a perfectly good, and very well-paid, job in law to study to be a nurse, and to be honest, though nursing did not pay that well, it was never really about money – it was about doing what I felt I was borne to do.
When it comes to using my healing skills (and I accept they are not really mine, I merely act as a channel to the Energy that causes healing) – I felt reluctant to accept money for that, because it felt somehow wrong to accept money for something that I have always been able to do, and indeed, healing is something I enjoy doing.
Then I had the good fortune to meet a very good friend, who pointed out to me, that money is ‘just’ solidified energy, and that when someone pays me for healing, it is an energy exchange, freely entered into by two or more consenting adults. I can understand that idea, and I agree with it. I can also see that doing a job you like and getting paid well for it, is exactly how it should be – though I know that for lots of us that is not the reality of the situation.
Yet, money and scarcity mentality maintain a firm foothold in my life – and there does indeed never seem to be enough money. I do all the meditations, I affirm to myself that I attract money, I have taken another job, and if possible will take a second one any day now if it materializes.
One thing I will not do for money is lie. I have had a job for a short amount of time, where I was doing ok, not great, but ok, until I realized that what I was selling was ‘hot air’ and that if anyone ever approached someone I loved with the same product and sold it to them, I would be spitting feathers in anger that they had so betrayed the innocence of the person I love. Therefore, lying to make money is not something I ever want to do again!
So, now I have a new job. Making appointments for a sales rep to go and see a business. So, business to business calling is not illegal, not immoral, not anything bad at all – it is the way of the world, and the product my colleague in sales will maybe eventually sell, after I set up the appointment, is a real and useful product, that will make the company purchasing it a huge amount of savings in time and money. And still, I am unable to lose the ‘niceness’ (a euphemism for not being pushy enough). I am puzzled. So when someone is obviously interested in what I am trying to get them to look at, I somehow cannot find the right words to ‘close’ the appointment.
I no longer believe there is anything inherently ‘bad’ about money (though I do believe that the love of money above all else is indeed the root of a lot of evil in the world). I am doing a job that I actually really enjoy, with a great boss, but seem unable to do that ‘last little bit’ in pinning down my ‘prospect’. I am sure there are techniques and I shall learn them, but I still wonder whether below that reluctance to make that little extra push at the end there is a deeper issue with the big M.
No, I have no great wish to be super wealthy, it would not mean that much, I have already simplified my life to the point where I want it to be, I do not need a bigger house, a newer car, more clothes, or things. I just want enough to pay the bills easily, and have a bit to spare to spend on doing some good for others, whilst saving a bit for emergency situations – that would never constitute a fortune in the books of anyone I know personally.
I would be really interested in hearing from those of you that have similar problems, or solutions. Maybe you know of some meditations, or affirmations, or techniques that will remove what I believe is a real ‘prosperity block’ in my life, and I would be very happy to hear about it.